Doing What You Said You Would

I keep stubbing my toe on the minor annoyance (or sometimes major issue) of other people not doing what they said they would. Some are simple things like not sending information in an email...days pass, weeks pass, month pass...reminders given...still nuthin. Some are specific tasks in on the critical path of a project -- "whoops, just didn't get to it" after the deadline has passed and the project is at risk.

I understand other priorities.
I understand procrastination.
I understand just not wanting to do XYZ.

I struggle with you not telling me if you can't or won't do something.

I struggle with you making me track you down like a bloodhound on a scent.. and then YOU get annoyed that I'm "nagging" you (oh say, 3 weeks after you agreed to do something).

I know I'm a nag. I try not to be, but it's my nature. I try to trust and not follow-up...and it works for a while, so I think "I should just lighten up and give people room to excel" -- but then I get burnt. There I am with a major deliverable dripping down my metaphorical chin....with no way to hit the deadline...my name's on the task, but the issue was upstream.

I just wish people would say: I'm sorry. I will not be able to do this, but I'm telling you early so you can make other plans.

That would be refreshing. I think.

'Dancing Panda' Scratches His Back - ABC News

This is a video that’s making the rounds:

'Dancing Panda' Scratches His Back - ABC News

It’s cute and, yeah, the little panda does kind look like he’s rockin’ to the beat.

But c’mon: it’s not news.

Somewhere along the way, the “human interest” story has taken over the rightful place of actual news on TV.

I know there is a “24-hour new cycle” and sometimes they say they have to scrape to find things to talk about… but why is it the news on BBC America is always chock-full-o-news?  And not just whiney, blaming, complaining new-ish stories… nope, they’ve got actual journalism.

I think the news networks in the US figured out they can quiet the masses with “bread and circuses” and - BONUS! - save quite a wad of cash by not hiring and rewarding reporters for reporting THE NEWS.

I think there should be yet one more icon/graphic on the incredibly over-crowded screen: a pie graph showing the % of not-news, % of gratuitous network plugs, and % of news – well, that would be a teeny-tiny sliver, so a zoom feature would be a necessity.

Now back to some lovely piece of eye-candy in the studio with more dancing bears, cinnamon toast with Jesus’ face on it, and cheating-yet-repentant Hollywood stars….

But Please Don't Ask Me If I Liked the Book

I belong to a book club filled with thoughtful women who bring interesting insights to our lively discussions - which are sometimes even about the book!

The one thing I don't like about the group is the tendency to begin the discussion of the book with the question "Who liked the book?" I'm sure I've annoyed the other ladies by objecting to that question - many of them say that it's logical to start with a quick "poll" to see where the conversation is going to go.

I see the point. And I will often ask friends "didja like it?" when they mention of book, movie, or event. The question provides an opening to share opinions and a de facto recommendation if they did like it.

However, in the context of a book club --- a group designed to come together and talk about the book in a more critical and evaluative way --- the question of "liking" can get in the way. If most members liked (or LOVED) the book, it sets up an "us versus them" situation if few members felt differently. Sometimes, those in the majority have even uttered "you're crazy" if someone else dares to dissent with the majority.

I think a much better question would be "what did you like about the book" -- because even when a book does not thrill a reader, she should be able to isolate the elements (plot, pacing, fresh language, lyric rhythms, etc) that she DID like. And conversely, identifying what you did not like and why might lead to more interesting discussions than "ooh I loved the book."

I guess my point is this: saying "I liked it" or "I hated it" creates an ending rather than a beginning to the discussion. Having planted your flag firmly in like or dislike, are you open to changing that opinion?

On the other hand, if someone explains why they didn't like the treatment of a character, it might make sense to you. It might make you think about the book in a different way. If someone shares a story from her life that reinforces the author's point, it might make you forgive clunky prose for the larger truth.

We've all heard the advice: If you want better conversation, start with open-ended question. Asking "What was the strangest thing that happened this week" will initiate a much more interesting discussion with your child, for example, than asking "Did you have a good week?" (Answer: "Yup.")

To me "who liked the book?" is a closed-end question that encourages binary thinking. Something more open-ended will yield a livelier discussion.